Thursday, April 2, 2015

Forever Weeping



 















In  sorrow the willow will always  weep 
opening
  her heart , tears  softly  flow 
crying for a world  that  has fallen  asleep 

planting seeds,  waiting for  dreams to reap 
under moonlight her slender  branches  glow
in  sorrow  the willow  will always  weep 

protecting precious secrets you  keep 
hidden in her trunk in the earth  below 
crying for  a world that  has fallen  asleep 

awakening silence she counts  lost  sheep
across the river  the wind  does  blow
in her sorrow the willow will  always weep

some will  fall the mountain is too steep
darkest nights, will the blackbird crow
crying for a world that has fallen asleep

hope in a horizon, sun begins to peep
will today be the day that love will grow
in sorrow the willow will always weep
crying for a world that has fallen asleep

pic Claude Monet - Weeping Willow
wikimedia

At dVerse writing Villanelle - hosted by Grace
I've never tried this before, so I am not sure
if I nailed it or not..

40 comments:

  1. I think you nailed it. You made the willow alive, like a real person.

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    1. Thanks Alex, it was a bit of a challenge..

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  2. Poor Willow... lovely images in the poem!

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    1. Hi Dezzie, thanks for visiting..I must go see what the spy has found.

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  3. You've found what I think of Willows and crafted it into words, form and beauty.

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    1. Thank you Gail, the willow is a special tree for me so symbolic in my life.

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  4. Nailed it indeed, the poor willows weep for all but their trunks keep them standing tall

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    1. Hi Pat, the willow is flexible and able to bend with the wind..standing tall through storms.

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  5. You gave the weeping willow character & emotions ~ I like the refrain:

    in sorrow the willow will always weep
    crying for a world that has fallen asleep

    Lovely job with the rhyming verses ~ Thanks for joining in Truedessa ~ Wishing you Happy Easter ~

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    1. Thanks Grace for an interesting prompt.

      Wishing you and yours a Happy Easter!

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  6. You totally nailed it. I love that you chose a weeping willow, a significant tree to me. Yes, she will always weep. We both had a mountain too steep in our poems, too, LOL...great minds.

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    1. Thanks Sherry, it was a challenge and I did notice we both referenced crows and mountains..lol..great minds indeed..Have a great weekend.

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  7. A poet's silver hammer goes to thee that nailed it; ah, yes; a nearly perfect response for a virgin effort, my goodness; a tribute to your talent & grasp of difficult form. A grand theme, very touching, with strong refrain lines, & inspired rhymes. I like the lines /protecting precious secrets you keep/hidden in her trunk in the earth below/.

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    1. Hi Glenn,

      This really took some work on my part..thank you for your kind words. I do love the weeping willow trees they are gorgeous and symbolic. Perhaps, they weep so we don't have to...

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  8. choosing crying for the world to have fallen asleep was perfect for your repetition because it's powerful and it makes a good refrain.


    The Befuddled Flatulent Blogger

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    1. Thanks..we need to wake the world up to events that are happening. Have a wonderful weekend.

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  9. So beautiful! I've always liked weeping willows but your poem makes them come alive more...weeping for a world that is asleep...oh my! I can't believe this your first villanelle. I am truly envious for the capturing this form and crafting so beauitully.

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    1. I think the subject helped me on this one as I am passionate about the weeping willow.

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  10. Particularly like the following lines:
    crying for a world that has fallen asleep
    awakening silence she counts lost sheep
    The alliteration in the first line is a bit of a tongue-twister for me, but there is something so fascinating about weeping willows - and that painting fits so well with your poem.

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    1. Hi Marina,

      Thank you for visiting..a bit of a tongue-twister, but then the weeping willow is complex..

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  11. Brought the weeping willow to life! You definitely nailed it - no doubt!

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    1. Thanks Anthony...it was an interesting prompt..

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  12. This is beautiful and haunting. I love that your b rhyme-scheme also rhymes with willow and sorrow. Peace, Linda

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    1. Thanks Linda ..peace to you as well..

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  13. This is so lovely, and animated!

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  14. well matched to the image, too ~

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    1. This painting really speaks to me and I adore willows.

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  15. Beautiful. Love your story of why the willow weeps

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    1. Thank you...I am sure the willow holds many stories.

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  16. Beautiful language and imagery--I found it quite moving.

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  17. Love the melody cry-like of willow....nice for the pic

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    1. Thanks humbird..she cries in a gentle breeze..

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  18. "Crying for a world that has fallen asleep"---this is absolutely lovely and rather apt in this day and age. Beautifully worded and the whole villanelle sounds lyrical to me, like the willow is singing or something. Great write.

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    1. Thank you C.C for the lovely comment..I wanted to convey her song..thanks for hearing it..

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  19. The painting, poem, theme and tears flow together so beautifully, Truedessa...sigh

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    1. Lynn thanks for visiting and I am glad you enjoyed my humble poem

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  20. nice - this really worked for me

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  21. Right on. Love these villanelles about weeping willows and black birds. This is imagery and metaphor that I too love to read and write!

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