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| courtesy of Pixabay |
You have your dreams, I have mine
we can still live in this world together
enlighten me, let's drink from the vine
write a tale about a love that's forever
we can still live in this world together
discover deep mysteries of the heart
write a tale about a love that's forever
manifest an original creation of art
discover deep mysteries of the heart
let our ballad be heard far and wide
manifest an original creation of art
sing me a song of who you are inside
let our ballad be heard far and wide
sad and sweet echoing through time
sing me a song of who you are inside
sing me a song of who you are inside
touch me with your internal rhymes
sad and sweet echoing through time
enlighten me, let's drink from the vine
touch me with your internal rhymes
you have your dreams, I have mine
form: Pantoum
sharing with dVerse Open Link Night
Thank you for visiting!
Peace, light and love always
sharing with dVerse Open Link Night
Thank you for visiting!
Peace, light and love always
The repetition of the lines brought it full circle. Beautiful rhythm!
ReplyDeleteThank you Alex! I had a bit of inspiration :)
DeleteA wonderful pantoum! I especially love the first two lines.
ReplyDeleteThank you my friend!
DeleteEach can have their own paths but stay side by side indeed. Great repetition in this one too.
ReplyDeleteThanks Pat and who knows where the path might lead?
DeleteI like this heralding of the light.
ReplyDeleteVery nicely balanced write that echoes with truth... Enjoyed it very much.
ReplyDeleteThank you Scott!
DeleteAn excellent pantoum, even has an extra stanza. I'm not used to seeing you write to forms; you are quite good at it.
ReplyDeleteHi Glenn, Occasionally I will write to form but, I usually just write to the wanderings of my mind. Thanks for visiting.
Delete"You have your dreams, I have mine". Wonderful open and close!
ReplyDeleteThanks Bev! I hope your dreams are good ones.
DeleteLove the sweet and dreamy pantoum. The rhyming pattern worked so well Truedessa. Happy weekend.
ReplyDeleteHi Grace wishing you a nice weekend as well, let’s hope spring arrives on warm breath...
DeleteA pantoum works so well as a love poem. Nice use of the form.
ReplyDeleteThank you Ken..
DeleteI really enjoyed this pantoum. Simply lovely.
ReplyDeleteThank you, sometimes form works well as the repetition reinforces the message.
DeleteNice line and challenge: "write a tale about a love that's forever"
ReplyDeleteHi Frank! It might be a challenge...
DeleteLove the rhyme and rhythm of this poem
ReplyDeleteThank you KB...
DeleteI have been looking at different kinds of poetry to write and the pantoum is one I'm tempted to try. Glad to see yours.
ReplyDeleteJamie, you should try the pantoum. Thanks for visiting.
DeleteI enjoyed your lyrical pantoum, Truedessa. I especially like how the pace and rhythm add to that ballad-like quality and enhance the sense of dreams and mystery and love the line ‘touch me with your internal rhymes’.
ReplyDeleteThank you Kim I believe life is filled with rhymes and synchronicity. Maybe, we just need to find the right pace/meter in the journey.
DeleteB-b-b-but there is sum people me don't wanna live together with in this world! Like half of Hollyweird....
ReplyDeleteDezzie I hear you but, we are all are on this marble together and we need to find a way to coexist. I mean, you don’t need to invite them over for dinner? Have a good weekend Dezzie...
DeleteOh gosh this is such a dreamy pantoum!❤️
ReplyDeleteThank you Sanaa
DeleteEnlighten me, too! The idea of a world where every single person dreams the same thing is... almost maddening. Variety adds spice to living. So, may we all get to dream our dream... and share it with other dreamers.
ReplyDeleteLovely Pantoum,... the thought of each being able to have their own dreams is perfect.
ReplyDeleteThere's room for everyone, IF we all learn to practice a little tolerance.
ReplyDeleteLovely, as always. Yes, we all have our dreams.
ReplyDeleteThis flows like a ballad. Songs can reveal unseen layers indeed.
ReplyDeletegorgeous lines and it is smooth and tastes like honey, well done! love the sweetness of your rhymes.
ReplyDeleteLovely. I wish you plenty of internal rhyming. :)
ReplyDeleteSo well said! Thank you! Big Hugs!
ReplyDelete"sing me a song of who you are inside
ReplyDeletetouch me with your internal rhymes"
exquisitely resonant!
I like how this flowed - in the beginning, it sounded almost like an ending, but wound around to a tightening of the relationship - nice!
ReplyDeleteI really liked this Trudessa, it was a very shared celebration... well crafted! :-)
ReplyDeleteI had no idea there are so many poem forms, and "pantoum" was a new one for me: A Malay form going back to the 15th Century. Whatever it is, I enjoyed it. The first verse sums up Terry's and my 37-year-old relationship! Have a good one!
ReplyDelete